Reflecting

One thing I have done a lot of since last July is reflect where I have been and were I want to go.

As part of that, I have thought about the six significant relationships I have had that were important in my life:

• The first relationship, simply because it was the first relationship. It was on and off for four years and the breakup sex was amazing.
• The second relationship, because it happened when I went through a bad patch.  It only lasted about three months, but he was the rock I anchored to when I needed a port in the storm.  Did I mention I had the best grades in college that term?
• The third relationship, because I learned something about in laws (or is that outlaws) and that I was not the only one with issues related to family dynamics.  I also learned about how distance changes things.  I also learned a little about couple dynamics.  It lasted nine months with a session my being on the receiving end of mercy sex a year after that (I was just told by my parents, "Leave and don't ever come back.")
• The fourth relationship because I learned it was OK to only be worth 99 Cents.  I also learned a lot about why one does not make others play with less than a full deck, and how nice daily sexual activity with someone you love can be.  It lasted two years after I knew him for one year; and, honestly, I did not recognize the significance of the relationship until 17 years later when Karma turned the tables on me and I was in my ex's shoes.  It took another six years to work up the nerve to call him up and apologize for my role in not understanding everything and how it contributed to the breakup.  In case you were wondering, yes I definitely had too much to drink before that call.
• Rick.  23 years of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly means that we could outdo War and Peace for what I learned.  I got a lot out of the relationship up to the very sad ending.  It was a ride I would not trade in for the world.
• The Amante.  I knew him for three years before we dated.  He taught me how you need to find joy in life in spite of it all, as he was going through rough times at the same time I was.  His death was a preview of what was to come when Rick died.

I still cry over the deaths of both Rick and the The Amante.  Whoever becomes Lucky Seven will have to realize that one.

But here is the good news for Lucky Seven.  He won't be a replacement for any of them!