Instant Gratification

Yes, I do understand why people want someone to wave a magic wand and rescue them.  I'm dating someone who is seeking just that so he can come back to San Diego.

I look at that through an intersting prism in that it took me 15 years from the time I decided I wanted to give SoCal a try until I wound up here.  During that time I did a lot of homework and planning.

As you may suspect, the original plan and what ended up happening were two different things.  Which means I am now in an agreeable neighborhood in Tijuana plotting my next move.

So patience may be a virtue after all.

Step One

In Alcoholics Anonymous, the first step is to admit,  "we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable." (The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, https://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/smf-121_en.pdf, viewed July 21, 2019.)

Today is a Facebook friend's second anniversary of taking that first step.  He showed a picture of the chip he got from AA celebrating two years.  More importantly he showed a pic of his mug shot which I presume was taken the day he took that first step.

Couple of things come to mind.

First, when I walk past AA meetings, it is not a rare sighting to see someone who could use help in dealing with their addictions outside looking in as the participants discuss their lives before and after they took Step One.  I suspect they know they have an issue, but are not for whatever reason ready to deal with it.

Which brings me to my next point, which I was reminded about the hard way.  I believe that no one can do Step One for someone else.  I may be fully cognizant that someone else has a problem even though they may not be a danger to themselves or others (that is another story,) but I cant fix things for them.

Of course, that brings a new challenge that I have to figure out how to deal with.  Again, that is another story for another time.

The last thing I was reminded of was the time I had to do Step One about something in December 1987.  I woke up after a three day drinking binge I engaged in after being thrown out by my parents in a stranger's bed.  I realized, that if I stayed in Houston, I would die a quick death.  I knew I had to leave in order to live and ended up starting a new life in Denver.

It was one of the best decisions I ever made.

Not another screw up.

Well, yes and no.

I thought Comic Con was last weekend and dovetailed with Pride.

It's really this weekend.

Fortunately, I'm back in Tijuana while the sellout weekend continues apace.

I also spent two days in Vegas.

And I am going to make all of you jealous.

I won.

And I spent my ill gotten gains on adult slushie treats.

Calling it an early evening.

Will churn, burn and do laundry tomorrow.

And figure out the next trip.

Four Years Later

Four years ago, about when I am writing this (11.22 PM) I thanked a nurse who came to the apartment, declared Rick dead, arranged for the coroner to release the remains to me and verified that I faxed the paperwork for his cremation so that the ball got rolling on that.

So, I've been a widower for four years.  It's been an amazing journey.

So let's look at what went wrong first over the past four years.

• I could have planned my San Francisco exit better.  Although I got what I wanted and then some out of my landlady, I should have not waited until the deal was inked to get rid of stuff.  The reason why I waited was just as the deal was about to be inked, she had an, "emergency," and needed to go to LA.  I didn't trust the woman to go through with it and was ready for a fight.  Should have not worried about her and just gotten my act together and gotten out.
  
• I was in and out of a roommate situation for four years that I really didn't want to continue.  It was an interesting ride, but I should have gotten out sooner.
  
• I haven't done as good a job as I should have regarding the health issues that cropped up after five years of caregiving.  Part of it was being aimless, but a few things have cropped up and I have to get to work on getting back into reasonable shape.
  
• I have not gone to Guatemala to give the Amate the good bye he deserved.  Especially over the past three weeks, he has popped up in my dreams.  I miss him very much.
  
  

Now, let's look at what went right.

• I got out of San Francisco.  I had wanted to for years and finally did it.  The uprooting was good for me and I don't have to deal with the effects of the economic cleansing of San Francisco.  I don't whine about being displaced in the least.  I'm happy I left for bigger and better things.
  
• I found a place that feels like home.  That place is Tijuana.  To an extent, I fell down when I quit the above mentioned roommate situation and this is the place that said, "Welcome home.  Glad you're back."  So I'm here.  I've picked myself up.  I've dusted myself off and it's on to the next round.  I've also revised my kitchen budget (Now MXN 12,500) and Washer / Dryer budget (MXN 20,000)
  
• I am catching up on the travel front.  Six trips to Texas, three to Las Vegas, Phoenix, Monterrey, Mazatlan, Mexico City (three times) and San Miguel de Allende (also three times)
  
• My new annual tradition is going to the LA Auto Show.  I might even do it on Thanksgiving Weekend.
  
• I've found I can date.  Kissed some frogs, but there may be a prince that came out of it all.  Stay tuned.

So, the adventure continues.  Let's see what life has in store for us.

As I Play Catch Up

This week has been nothing but playing catch up.

I should be done with it by the end of the week.

I'm also dealing with another issue

Comic Con

San Diego Pride is the same day as the start of Comic Con.  This means it's impossible to get a hotel room at a decent price.  If the situation were different, I would just do a quick trip to San Diego to pick up mail and skate.  However it's Pride and I don't want to miss it, so I will have to get creative on how I will do all the US stuff I need to do after I get my check.

Vegas maybe?

Who knows.  All I know is I won't go running back to the ex roommate any time soon.

Back to Square One

So, I am now back in Tijuana.

I'm not dealing with the lies

I'm not dealing with the untrustworthiness

And I'm not going back.

I'm sorry the dog is unhappy that I left, but even he knows the now former housemate is a louse and a screw up.

And the relationship drama hit a new low.  The former housemate and his boyfriend broke up.  Guess he couldn't handle the fact that the boyfriend is raising a kid with his ex.

And the former housemate wants me to come back.

I may have to go, again, to Palm Springs to sit him down and lay all the cards on the table. I mean it has hit the point where 30 seconds have elapsed and the act is not worthy of continuing.

GONG

In other news, Tijuana Pride was a success and I had some fun.  It was nice celebrating something for once, even if it was the fact I found a new bar to hang out in.

So, here is to more stories about good times.

OK crisis almost solved

OK, so unexpected expenses have happened due to a chapter of my life ending badly.  Oh well, it just means that we cannot be generous with money for three weeks, and I'm OK with that.

That said, not having to live with someone who wants to live the druggie life - PRICELESS!  My only regret is not making the decision in Houston not to go back to the BS.  Of course Karma immediately reacted by making absolutely sure that irrops would bite me on the butt.

But what's done is done.  Yeah, money will be tight for a little while, but it will work out in the end.

But I'm not dealing with someone who made the decision to live the druggie life with his druggie boyfriend.

In other news, I set up the GPS notification so the bank can track me down when I put something on my card.  That way, it will make life in Mexico much easier.

Anyway, coming soon is the revenge trip.   Should be fun.

Stay tuned.