Reflecting

One thing I have done a lot of since last July is reflect where I have been and were I want to go.

As part of that, I have thought about the six significant relationships I have had that were important in my life:

• The first relationship, simply because it was the first relationship. It was on and off for four years and the breakup sex was amazing.
• The second relationship, because it happened when I went through a bad patch.  It only lasted about three months, but he was the rock I anchored to when I needed a port in the storm.  Did I mention I had the best grades in college that term?
• The third relationship, because I learned something about in laws (or is that outlaws) and that I was not the only one with issues related to family dynamics.  I also learned about how distance changes things.  I also learned a little about couple dynamics.  It lasted nine months with a session my being on the receiving end of mercy sex a year after that (I was just told by my parents, "Leave and don't ever come back.")
• The fourth relationship because I learned it was OK to only be worth 99 Cents.  I also learned a lot about why one does not make others play with less than a full deck, and how nice daily sexual activity with someone you love can be.  It lasted two years after I knew him for one year; and, honestly, I did not recognize the significance of the relationship until 17 years later when Karma turned the tables on me and I was in my ex's shoes.  It took another six years to work up the nerve to call him up and apologize for my role in not understanding everything and how it contributed to the breakup.  In case you were wondering, yes I definitely had too much to drink before that call.
• Rick.  23 years of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly means that we could outdo War and Peace for what I learned.  I got a lot out of the relationship up to the very sad ending.  It was a ride I would not trade in for the world.
• The Amante.  I knew him for three years before we dated.  He taught me how you need to find joy in life in spite of it all, as he was going through rough times at the same time I was.  His death was a preview of what was to come when Rick died.

I still cry over the deaths of both Rick and the The Amante.  Whoever becomes Lucky Seven will have to realize that one.

But here is the good news for Lucky Seven.  He won't be a replacement for any of them!

Omer Time

Well, not quite.  It is Erev Passover and before it starts, I thought I would dash off a quick note.

It's been a while since I last posted for a lot of reasons.  Some are good, but most of it has been due to my laziness.  I am in Desert Hot Springs until June basically hanging out with a good friend (more on that later.)

So, why am I starting up again now?  It's a long story, but it starts with Jewish perspectives on how long a guy should wait before remarrying.  Women have this one easy, they only need to wait 90 days after their mate dies to remarry.  The waiting period for men is a little longer in that they have to celebrate Sukkot, Passover and Shavuot before they can remarry.  This means it can be anywhere from about six months to over a year depending on the date of death.

I've been through Sukkot, Passover starts in less than two hours and one counts the 49 day period between the first day of Passover and Shavuot and gives a daily blessing.  I also want to celebrate I got through the waiting period that seemed to feel right for me.  I decided as part of the celebration, I would join our Jewish brothers and sisters in counting up the Omer.  I also decided in the spirit of using the Omer to reflect, I am going to post every day except for tomorrow and next Friday which will cover the Yom Tov periods in Passover where you are not supposed to be on the computer blogging.

So, let's start the journey.  Shall we?

About San Bernadino

After one month in Desert Hot Springs in a situation that ultimately did not pan out, I decided to hang out in Tijuana until I start another trek to Texas in a week.

As timing would have it, I was at the Otay Mesa border crossing when the San Bernadino mass shooting aftermath was in full swing.  Which means I am reading all the articles and editorials about the incident in a city where you see the Mexican army out on patrol M-16s at the ready.  Also, everyone asks me about my personal safety here.

First off, about my personal safety.  Tijuana is a place where using your Urban Survival Skills is essential.  Also you need to put that smartphone away if you are walking.  The sidewalks are really dangerous here and if you are not careful you may trip, fall and really hurt yourself.  So, yes, I do feel safe here.  It's another story, but I also find it amusing that the slogan on police cars here is, "Working to serve you better!!"

With that out of the way, I think it's really scary that the US is a country that will not lift a finger for whatever reason to address the fact that someone with issues can go out, obtain an arsenal of assault weapons, and go out and massacre people.  The most Republican politicians can offer in the US is the now trite, "thoughts and prayers for the victims."

And Democrats are not doing much better.  They should be screaming at the top of their lungs that something needs to be done because it is imperiling the security of the United States.

So, when is action going to be taken on this one?

Haircuts

For the first time since July, I got my hair cut in the US.

No, that does not mean my hair was so shaggy it was out of control.  In the interim I got my hair cut twice in Mexico.

The first instance was related to the quincañera I went to.  Rick's grand nephew offered to cut my hair when I told him I needed one, and I got to meet his family in the process.  The whole thing went well and it was interesting that I got my first ever juried haircut.  Between his aunt, his nephews and the dog barking its comments, the young man's job was thoroughly evaluated.

The second time was equally interesting in that I got it done at a high end barbershop in Tijuana.  I was a little sticker shocked at the price, but he did a really nice job and I would go back in a heartbeat.

Which comes to this version.  It was good, but if you thought I got sticker shock with the haircut in Tijuana, the one in Palm Springs really sticker shocked me and reminded me as to how much farther the money goes in Mexico.

So, we will see where I get it done next.  The US or Mexico.

Now That I Am In the Same Place for A While ...

I can catch up on this blog.

First off, Happy Halloween.

Second, I have completed the Heritage Tour that encompassed US and six Mexican states.

One birthday celebration, two reunions and hanging out at the beach were the orders of the day.

And some work.

So, what I will do is spend the next few posts recapping the trip.

Right now, however, I am getting ready to go out for Halloween for the first time in who knows how long.  When I lived in San Francisco, it wound up being downright unsafe to be out on Halloween because Halloween in the Castro was so out of control.  Now that I am in the Coachella Valley, it should be calmer and a friend and I will be venturing out to see all the adult ghosts and goblins in Palm Springs.

Enjoy your Halloween, whatever you do.

Day Three of the Heritage Tour

When I discuss my trip that will take me to San Antonio, Piedras Negras and Mazatlan; I refer to it as the Heritage Tour.  The intended start date of the extravaganza was to be next Wednesday.  I also intended to start the trip in San Diego, California.  Instead, it started on Wednesday in Desert Hot Springs, California.

If there is anyone to blame for that one, it would by my amate.  You see, he completely flaked on a date.  In the process, I met and spent some time with someone who was engineering a move from Little Elm, TX (It's a suburb of Dallas) to Palm Springs, CA for health reasons.  We exchanged Facebook info and communicated that way for quite some time.  He also spent time with me in July 2014.

Fast forward to now.  I am based in San Diego and he in Desert Hot Springs.  I spent time with him last week and he asked if I could see him after my trip ended.  Since all that means is that I enter the US at Mexicali instead of Tijuana as intended, I said yes.

So, here I am in Tijunana hanging out and taking care of a few things before I get on the combination of the Pacific Surfliner and Sunset Limited to go to San Antonio.

More to come.

Missing Radio Shack

The demise of Radio Shack created a problem for me last week.

I needed a USB cable that attached to a mini (not micro) USB plug so my camera and laptop could communicate.  In the not too recent past, that would have meant a trip to a friendly, neighborhood Radio Shack to get the appropriate cable.

No longer.

It meant that when I was in San Diego, instead of walking or taking the bus to the Radio Shack in Hillcrest, I had to trek to Fry's Electronics to get the cable, and I was glad I was consolodating the task of getting a Six Dollar Cable with three other errands and had a time constraint the justified my trekking around San Diego in a BMW X1 thanks to Zipcar.

Are you listening Hillcrest Ace Hardware?

Anyway, the camera is ready, willing and able to trek on the Grand Heritage tour with me in October.  What was on the memory card is now on a travelogue and I have room for 1,200 pictures for my Heritage Trip.

Now, if only I can get my bank on board.