During this time of reflection, I've gotten a more serene about the current situation.
I also realize that I may have been unrealistic immediately after Rick died thinking I would jump right back into the workforce and pick up where I left off. I should have been more realistic and given myself the room to grieve and heal. Ultimately that is what I did.
I'm also serene about the fact that it took nine years to wind up in the situation I was in when Rick died. Now that I realize that getting back to the better position I was in in 2006 is going to take a little while. What's good about that is I no longer kick myself for taking so long to get back to that point.
Guess the other thing I need to work on is realizing that I probably will wind up at a different point. Sort of like a lateral move.
I'm going to take it easy this weekend and celebrate with a glass of Processo as I work on the issue of getting badly needed R&R.
Hopefully that will be fun.
Friday, March 29, 2019
Wednesday, March 27, 2019
Little Victories
After hearing someone I did work for got a withholding notice from the Franchise Tax Board saying I owe them money, I called them to find out what was going on.
It turns out they still believed that I worked in San Francisco and made an estimate that was incorrect by a long shot. Ultimately, the notice got undone. They also didn't realize that for several years I was so broke I didn't have to file a tax return (so I didn't)
So that little problem is solved on terms more favorable than expected (I don't have to do any work or submit documentation.)
And, that is some good news that I needed right now. I'm exhausted and need a little non duty related play time. And no, I'm not dealing with my housemate who expects me to take him and pay for all the drinks. Not after his screw ups.
So, here is to more of Lent.
It turns out they still believed that I worked in San Francisco and made an estimate that was incorrect by a long shot. Ultimately, the notice got undone. They also didn't realize that for several years I was so broke I didn't have to file a tax return (so I didn't)
So that little problem is solved on terms more favorable than expected (I don't have to do any work or submit documentation.)
And, that is some good news that I needed right now. I'm exhausted and need a little non duty related play time. And no, I'm not dealing with my housemate who expects me to take him and pay for all the drinks. Not after his screw ups.
So, here is to more of Lent.
Saturday, March 23, 2019
I gotta realize something took nine years.
The timeline between Rick being diagnosed with colon cancer and his death spanned nine years. During that time I was not assertive in pursuing my career, took a significant amount of time to take care of Rick and took major financial beatings.
During needed Lenten reflection, I realized that I wasn't doing well for seven years after I got out of college and when I finally got a footing, it probably took that long to get back on my feet after being forced to run away from home flat broke.
I then concluded I am going through the same thing now and I didn't instantly snap back to where I was before all hell broke loose. It'll be a marathon and not a sprint.
Hopefully I can enjoy the process.
During needed Lenten reflection, I realized that I wasn't doing well for seven years after I got out of college and when I finally got a footing, it probably took that long to get back on my feet after being forced to run away from home flat broke.
I then concluded I am going through the same thing now and I didn't instantly snap back to where I was before all hell broke loose. It'll be a marathon and not a sprint.
Hopefully I can enjoy the process.
Wednesday, March 20, 2019
Busy time
When it rains, it pours.
And that also applies to work.
It seems to have picked up for a while and I am glad for that. I will definitely use the money in May when I go to Texas.
Those plans are up in the air because after San Antonio I don't know if the next stop is Houston, Dallas or both. I do know I want to stay until after my birthday simply because I can celebrate it with someone there. The main reason for going (watching my nephew graduate college) is set and I have a date. Woo Hoo.
And because it was acting up, I Passover Cleaned the freezer which was full of ice from a prior occurrence.
On to the next round.
And that also applies to work.
It seems to have picked up for a while and I am glad for that. I will definitely use the money in May when I go to Texas.
Those plans are up in the air because after San Antonio I don't know if the next stop is Houston, Dallas or both. I do know I want to stay until after my birthday simply because I can celebrate it with someone there. The main reason for going (watching my nephew graduate college) is set and I have a date. Woo Hoo.
And because it was acting up, I Passover Cleaned the freezer which was full of ice from a prior occurrence.
On to the next round.
Thursday, March 14, 2019
Villain of the Day
Like a lot of people I am following the scandal in which the rich and famous allegedly engaged in schemes to get their Precious Little Angels into the right colleges. I noted the guy who did all the work, Rick Singer, is a fellow Trinity University Alumnus. He played baseball and basketball and wound up being a coach who got fired a few times before getting into the college admission business.
That is where he pushed the envelope and did extreme stuff to assuage anxious (and wealthy) parents that his efforts could get their Precious Little Angel into the right, high profile, college.
It reminded me of another Trinity Alumnus who got in deep legal trouble. His name was Paul Rush.
I met him when I was a freshman and he recently graduated and worked for what was then known as Cullen/Frost - a large bank in San Antonio. As he worked his way up the ranks, he also embezzled about $500,000. He went to prison for 27 months for that.
You would have thought he learned his lesson, right?
Wrong.
It seems that he also stole money from a trust where he was the trustee as his business was failing. He got 10 years for that.
When he was released, he got a job with a consulting firm and shortly afterward developed Stage 4 esophageal cancer. He passed away in 2015,
A sad ending.
Why didn't he RTFM and figure out a legit way to be a power broker.
Next question - Will Olivia Jade Giannulli hire a crisis management firm in light of her brand being damaged by all this? Will she get kicked out of USC?
Time will tell.
But here's another thing. If my life took a different path, I would be dealing with a kid pursuing their post high school life. I wonder how they would feel if I said something like, "It's OK if you don't go to Trinity (undergraduate alma mater) or Boston University (graduate alma mater.) Now, tell me which Claremont College you picked out."
Kid would probably rebel and declare that their first choice is Humboldt State or something like that.
Yes, I would be supportive so that I would have a happy kid.
On to the next round.
That is where he pushed the envelope and did extreme stuff to assuage anxious (and wealthy) parents that his efforts could get their Precious Little Angel into the right, high profile, college.
It reminded me of another Trinity Alumnus who got in deep legal trouble. His name was Paul Rush.
I met him when I was a freshman and he recently graduated and worked for what was then known as Cullen/Frost - a large bank in San Antonio. As he worked his way up the ranks, he also embezzled about $500,000. He went to prison for 27 months for that.
You would have thought he learned his lesson, right?
Wrong.
It seems that he also stole money from a trust where he was the trustee as his business was failing. He got 10 years for that.
When he was released, he got a job with a consulting firm and shortly afterward developed Stage 4 esophageal cancer. He passed away in 2015,
A sad ending.
Why didn't he RTFM and figure out a legit way to be a power broker.
Next question - Will Olivia Jade Giannulli hire a crisis management firm in light of her brand being damaged by all this? Will she get kicked out of USC?
Time will tell.
But here's another thing. If my life took a different path, I would be dealing with a kid pursuing their post high school life. I wonder how they would feel if I said something like, "It's OK if you don't go to Trinity (undergraduate alma mater) or Boston University (graduate alma mater.) Now, tell me which Claremont College you picked out."
Kid would probably rebel and declare that their first choice is Humboldt State or something like that.
Yes, I would be supportive so that I would have a happy kid.
On to the next round.
Tuesday, March 12, 2019
Ultimatum Delivered
I made it that simple.
If the niece sows up again, I'm outta here.
At least the drug smell has dissipated.
Between HR theory and a past relationship, I know that when it hits the point where someone tells someone else, "Shape up or else," The person making the statement had better be fully prepared to do or else. Although I hope for the best, I'm ready.
Is part of it my bad? Yes. I'll own that. But I have been in more than my share of bad situations and this one is nasty.
At least my dealbreaker is out there.
If the niece sows up again, I'm outta here.
At least the drug smell has dissipated.
Between HR theory and a past relationship, I know that when it hits the point where someone tells someone else, "Shape up or else," The person making the statement had better be fully prepared to do or else. Although I hope for the best, I'm ready.
Is part of it my bad? Yes. I'll own that. But I have been in more than my share of bad situations and this one is nasty.
At least my dealbreaker is out there.
Today's plan
OK
I will admit it.
I uck fuped.
I made a mistake by returning to the desert in February.
I have unfortunately found out that my roommate is a pathological liar.
Even though he swore on a stack of Bibles that his beloved's niece was persona non grata after she pounded on the door to his room at all hours of the night. Guess what?
She was back with his beloved.
Twice
And the second time she pounded on the door all afternoon as I was trying to get work done.
Not good.
I'm keeping my base in San Diego.
Although I made the mistake, I will move on.
And maybe go to H town in a couple of weeks.
I will admit it.
I uck fuped.
I made a mistake by returning to the desert in February.
I have unfortunately found out that my roommate is a pathological liar.
Even though he swore on a stack of Bibles that his beloved's niece was persona non grata after she pounded on the door to his room at all hours of the night. Guess what?
She was back with his beloved.
Twice
And the second time she pounded on the door all afternoon as I was trying to get work done.
Not good.
I'm keeping my base in San Diego.
Although I made the mistake, I will move on.
And maybe go to H town in a couple of weeks.
Thursday, March 7, 2019
Life is Precious
Today, I learned that one of my classmates from High School passed away in Feburary.
I remember her because for some reason, she had a crush on me. It was unrequited, but she and I were in the same homeroom for three years. Anyway, she wound up graduating from UT Austin, was a Tri Delt, did Junior League, married twice and had four kids.
The whole thing reminded me that life is precious - and too freaking short.
Brief explanation.
With the exception of a trip to LA and one to Houston, I have been in the Desert since mid November. It seems that the housemate who I did not intend to return to when I was trekking in Mexico got himself into some really deep shit.
It seems he used Daddy's credit card when he wasn't supposed to to buy Uber rides for his beloved. As he was confronted by Daddy, he also hacked off a houseguest of his (good friend) and both he and Daddy wound up in the same car heading to Palm Springs.
Let the reading begin.
When Daddy returned, he told housemate he, "needed to learn how to behave," and threatened to put a For Sale sign on the house. Mommy intervened and as a result I was asked to move back in as a minder. Against my better judgment, I agreed. Result? His posterior was saved.
Anyhoo, he was doing his thing with his beloved until right before Xmas, when they broke up. He then went to Dallas to visit his family and returned early. All in all, his behavior was acceptable.
I then planned a trip to Houston and got flight deals out of the Ontario airport making the 60 mile trek worthwhile. I asked if I could get a ride to and from the airport from him and he said, "Yes."
Well, guess what. He changes his mind because his beloved is back in the picture. Sooo, while he is engaged in whatever he does with someone who I only see passed out in his bed recovering from a drug induced stupor. I had to trek on my own to the Ontario airport. The trek back was especially miserable as the train between Pomoma and Palm Springs was three hours late.
I was not a happy boy.
To make things works, the roommate has made representations related to his beloved that just weren't true.
Time to look for a new living arrangement.
Life is too short to deal with this fecal matter.
I remember her because for some reason, she had a crush on me. It was unrequited, but she and I were in the same homeroom for three years. Anyway, she wound up graduating from UT Austin, was a Tri Delt, did Junior League, married twice and had four kids.
The whole thing reminded me that life is precious - and too freaking short.
Brief explanation.
With the exception of a trip to LA and one to Houston, I have been in the Desert since mid November. It seems that the housemate who I did not intend to return to when I was trekking in Mexico got himself into some really deep shit.
It seems he used Daddy's credit card when he wasn't supposed to to buy Uber rides for his beloved. As he was confronted by Daddy, he also hacked off a houseguest of his (good friend) and both he and Daddy wound up in the same car heading to Palm Springs.
Let the reading begin.
When Daddy returned, he told housemate he, "needed to learn how to behave," and threatened to put a For Sale sign on the house. Mommy intervened and as a result I was asked to move back in as a minder. Against my better judgment, I agreed. Result? His posterior was saved.
Anyhoo, he was doing his thing with his beloved until right before Xmas, when they broke up. He then went to Dallas to visit his family and returned early. All in all, his behavior was acceptable.
I then planned a trip to Houston and got flight deals out of the Ontario airport making the 60 mile trek worthwhile. I asked if I could get a ride to and from the airport from him and he said, "Yes."
Well, guess what. He changes his mind because his beloved is back in the picture. Sooo, while he is engaged in whatever he does with someone who I only see passed out in his bed recovering from a drug induced stupor. I had to trek on my own to the Ontario airport. The trek back was especially miserable as the train between Pomoma and Palm Springs was three hours late.
I was not a happy boy.
To make things works, the roommate has made representations related to his beloved that just weren't true.
Time to look for a new living arrangement.
Life is too short to deal with this fecal matter.
Lent
Today is the first day of Lent.
It is also the 21st anniversary of my dad's death.
A lot of reflecting going on.
All I know is this. I now predicate any prayers for my father with one that goes along the lines of
Dear G-d, As you know my father was not a good parent and the only reason why I pray for him is that you have given a commandment to honor one's parents. Please give me the ability to forgive, and if you fail at that, let the wounds heal with time. Amen.
The wounds are slowly healing.
More postings to come.
It is also the 21st anniversary of my dad's death.
A lot of reflecting going on.
All I know is this. I now predicate any prayers for my father with one that goes along the lines of
Dear G-d, As you know my father was not a good parent and the only reason why I pray for him is that you have given a commandment to honor one's parents. Please give me the ability to forgive, and if you fail at that, let the wounds heal with time. Amen.
The wounds are slowly healing.
More postings to come.
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